You Can Be Afraid and Not Be in Danger

Hello Everyone,

I hope this post finds you well. I also hope you’re finding these posts helpful! If there are any topics you’d like me to cover in the future, let me know. Now, let’s dive in.                         

You Can Be Afraid and Not Be in Danger

When it comes to dealing with an anxiety disorder, our automatic response isn’t always the right one. Let me explain. Picture this: You’re hiking through the woods, enjoying the fresh air, when suddenly, a massive grizzly bear appears on the trail ahead. Your brain instantly fires up the "GET OUT OF HERE" protocol. Your heart pounds, adrenaline surges, and you instinctively retreat as quietly (and quickly) as possible. In this case, fear is completely justified because, well… It's a grizzly bear! Your response? Smart. Survival-based.

Now, let’s switch scenarios. You’re driving along, minding your own business, when you spot a bridge up ahead. The bridge looks perfectly fine—no cracks, no trolls lurking underneath—but anxiety still kicks in. Your brain sounds the same alarm as if you were facing a wild animal, even though there’s no real danger. If you avoid the bridge, the fear wins. And the next time you approach a different bridge, guess what? Your brain remembers, and soon that bridge becomes scary too. Rinse and repeat, and suddenly you're mapping out cross-country routes exclusively based on bridge-free travel.

The problem is that our brains don’t always do a great job distinguishing real danger from imagined danger. It’s like watching a horror movie—you know you’re safe in the theater, but when the eerie music starts, your body tenses up anyway. Anxiety disorders work the same way. You feel fear, so you assume something must be wrong, and avoidance feels like the safest option. But in reality, dodging these situations only makes anxiety stronger over time.

A helpful acronym I often share with my clients is:
FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real

Anxiety tricks us into believing that something is dangerous when it’s not. The good news? You can retrain your brain to recognize that just because you feel afraid doesn’t mean you’re actually in any danger and make it a point to not avoid your next “bridge”.

If you want to dive deeper into this topic, I highly recommend Panic Attacks Workbook by David Carbonell. It’s a great resource that breaks these ideas down in a practical, approachable way. I would especially suggest Chapter 10 - The Rule Of Opposites.

Thanks for reading! If this post resonated with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts or experiences in the comments. Also, if you know someone who might benefit from this, feel free to share it. And if someone was kind enough to forward this post to you and you’re interested in subscribing, you can do so here.

And a quick reminder: While I hope this post is helpful, it’s not a substitute for therapy. If you’re struggling with anxiety or OCD, I encourage you to reach out to a qualified therapist. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Stay safe,

Dr. Bob